Some new citizens of Stagrâm showed up recently to pay their respects to Princess Slutsöf. It's always amazing to meet new fans of this marvelous tale.  Keep sending them! Every submission makes Slutsöf dance with Joy.

Jessica writes : "In this tale, princess Slütsof is at her castle (one of their main exports is the rare
Stragramian blue marble,  as used on the palace) when pirates attack! She swims out to begin
peaceful negotiations when it is discovered that her evil twin sister is the head of the Pirates!"
What an adventure! Stragramian is Stagram's main export it's also what makes Slutsof's shoes so shiney.

So Majestic! But I think her crown might be too big. Great job Anton!

Italian Illustrator Frederica Nardi sent in this amazing artwork. I've been told the snake gentleman's name is Dicksöf

Alex Cream writes: "Hi. this is a winter themed colorized night photo of princess slutsöf circa 2018. Thanks for the cause." 
Graffit sends greetings from Berlin and this great message from Slutsof. Be cool, stay in school kids.

We even received a Whöresof cosplay. Look out Comic 2019

I received a few submissions this morning and over the weekend so I thought I'd throw them up. It's been a tad quiet over here in Stagram, but don't fret something new is in the works ;) Your emails are like Tinkerbell claps. Keep'em coming, even just to say hi, each one makes my day.

 Christian Cordts sent in this masterpiece of The Nasty MasterThief taking the princess' crown.​ In Stagram that is equal only to treason! Off with his spikey head!
 Noah Biblis  made this sweet flag. He writes "The goats and ducks in the top left represent Slutsof and Whoresof, while the gold X over the black and white bars represents the evil king locked away".  DAMN YOU TYRANT KING!
 Chris Marquis sent in this amazing Stagram alphabet which I now pronounce as the official written language of Stagram.
Any one want to make this into a font?
Chris Marquis writes "this is a depiction of whoresof, who, after reuniting with slutsof, rescuing him in the tyrant king's dungeon, decides to get some payback, and once again save stagram from the tyrant king's EVIL clutches" oooooohkaaaay Chris.

Keya Kersting writes "This is Slütsöf having a nightmare about an even bigger evil lurking within her brother Whöresöf than the evil king." One word...terrifying.

Wiggins Writes "Slütsof finds Whöresof captured by the evil king, but anxious to rescue Whöresof, she does not realize that she is being trapped as well! What will happen to Slütsof and Whöresof!?" Nooo Slutsof its a trap!

FrostByteUK sent in a new character named Kindürfingrün: He has 7 and a half brothers and sisters and was found in a magic temple which was carved in a cave in the mountains which contains the cave of the Cyclops.

Hans Fandango sent in this piece he drew for Inktober (that's a thing?) Look at her beautiful hair, it looks like the cover of a box of Blondissima! Also great sparkle work.  

Jacob Branchflower sent in this photo realistic rendering of Slutsof swiming to Stagram. She looks so Majestic. Keep your eyes out for the whirlpool and Pirates!

This is deep Felix Summ. What does it mean? You had me at Sashimi and you lost me at Chestburster.

Cold Pizza has titled his latest master piece: Fifty Shades of Slutsof.  Oh jesh.


Sorry to have disappeared for a while there, I was busy taking meetings with some Hollywood producers to discuss movie and video game rights. It's been a whirlwind, Me and Harvey Weinstein were doing Sake bombs in his Hot tub and then Leo did a back flip into the pool, it was radica---Who am I fooling? That's a lie, I was just trying to impress you guys. I sat on a pull-out couch in my sweatpants, ate Ben and Jerry's H.B.C. and re-watched the series boxset of The Wire....Entourage?...Okay fine, it was Gossip Girl. A man can dream though right? Especially when that man sleeps 16 hours a day. 

To those that have asked, no replies yet, one thing that was strange though was: the other day some guy in a purple hoodie drove by in a Volkswagon GTI and egged me, and then he yelled "I'm CEO bitch!" probably unrelated though.

Anyway here some sweet submissions.

Grant Bruckner sent is this sassy picture of Slütsof talking to someone named Mr. Fuckerberg? Who ever he is, he seems to be asking some peculiar questions about Whoresof.

Jeroen a video game artist sent in this concept art. I think we need to make a video game. Who's in?

Þorri Líndal Guðnason writes "Sometimes Slütsof doesn't have a care in the world (of Stagram)" You couldn't be more correct Porri, It's monday today and I can honestly say, I don't give a duck either.

Julia Sukan Writes: " It is a bird's eye view picture of Slütsof doing her daily patrol of Stagram. You can see the Northern part of the island of Stagram. There is Speckbeard's pirate cove, Unicornington Upon Slütswhöres town, the fisherman's village, the Quackington arms Brewery and Lodge which is where Slütsof lives, Whöresof Castle, the elephant range, the witches hut and magic frog lake and the much respected statue of the late King Slütswhöres all surrounding the Stagram river." --Things missing in this detailed map, Duck University, Dragon fruit Orchard and Whoresof's favorite pub, The Hoof and Feather.

Cold Pizza: "Here Slutsof is shown making it rain. In the wise words of Juicy J, bandz a make her dance." --Oh no Slütsöf you have better options! 

Cameron Nunya writes: "Slutsof has shared a picture of her on the very popular social media picture sharing site" --Wow Slütsöf in another video game! 69,420 votes holy moly, I don't know about her username though, what an odd number to choose.

Murc writes: "Found an old banner in my grandma's attic a while ago. There is also a faded motto written on the reverse side - "Credo in interiori anatis, semper fidelis, semper Stagram" I don't speak Stagramese" --My Stagramese is a bit rusty too, but I think it means "Always Faithful and Always Loyal, All Hail Princess Slutsof!"

Anna Zuchowicz writes "Best wishes from Iceland" --Wow we made it all the way to Iceland, thanks Anna. I'm not sure that's the safe way to hold a sword though. Unless it's like an Iceland thing or something, hitting some one with the handle would probably hurt too I guess.

Due to it's popularity Ikea has started to sell Unauthorized Slütsöf plushes. I think I might have to send them a cease a desist letter. Thanks for the heads up Edward Green.

I have no idea what's happening in this picture submitted by Richard Wigley the accompanying email did not clear anything up. 

Cold Pizza writes "Slutsof is shown here being carried away by Whöresof to celebrate their reunion. A night of festivities awaits them." --Oh dear, I don't want to know what Whöresof has planned.

Here's a picture of the cyclops celebrating the 2014 soccer World Cup in his cave, apparently he's a Germany fan and breathes fire. Thanks Class Grim.

This is Whöresof showing off his laser hoof and dinosaur shoulder pad? Cool piercings, what a funky goat.

Cold Pizza writes "Slütsöf is shown here taking a picture of [herself] with [her] legs wide open." No Slütsöf you don't have to do that. What would your brother think!

Toopy Goo writes "I made some concept art, of a potential pokemon crossover? I have included a rare sketch of Slütsöf throwing a pokeball at a voltorb."

Alexandra Aton writes "So today I was in the mood of making something kitchy, like a collage of kids drawings. Big fan, btw! "    ---Looking good Slütsöf she must be in the rolling hills just west of Ghost Forrest.

Ian Warde writes "We have enclosed an image of Princess Slutsof taking a 'selfie' infront of her castle. This has been super-duper imposed on a pink glittery background"  --Wow look at Slütsöf she's so technical, she's putting her picture up on the internet using some kind of video game.

Cameron Nunya writes "I worked tirelessly for at least 27 minutes to conceptualize and produce this spin-off movie sequel." --What a coincidence 27 minutes is the running time of Showgirls when they play it on TBS. Cool poster, some one get Paul Verhoeven's agent on the line.

Felix Summ writes "I made a picture of Whöresof and Slütsöf going on an adventure to find Slütsöf's stolen treasure."  --Ring. Ring. Hello tattoo artist? Put this on my butt cheek pronto.

Rowan Watt: "Here is a picture for your epic series. It is a pin-up of Höttest Picsfröm, the feared pirate seal. I hope you like it."   --All I can say is hubba hubba. Nice manicure.

Slütsof is really bummed out and Shakespearian in this picture from Keaton O

 Morfgo "Here's my concept for Slütsof with a rifle. He's killing all the bad guys in Stagram."  --First off it's a she, duh. And second Slutof would never hold an M-16 with her feet, that's dangerous. She'd use her wings.

I will spare you all from the really weird submissions I've been getting lately. I guess it all comes down to rule 34, but the things they have made Slutsof do. Poor poor Slutosof.

GB Ghidoragh writes "so I created this piece of art showing Slütsöf defying the far away dragons beyond the Evil Kings Lair." --All I can say is Holy moly! I want to get this painted on the side of my van.

Is this a production still from Peter Jackson's Legends of Stagrâm? Slütsof looks like such a classy lady duck. Good idea to put her pearls in her treaure box for safe keeping.

Well this was bound to happen eventually.  NOT SAFE FOR STAGRAM! (submitted by Mackenze Edwards)

Drew Barrow writes "I hand painted a painting of Slütsof guiding the pirates from Pirate Sea through a deadly storm." -- It doesn't look like Slütsof is doing a very good job, that pirate got zapped.

It's a little known fact that the next Fire and Ice book will feature a new family, House of Whöresof.  Where do you think Khaleesi's dragons came from, Dragonland duh. Hopefully one day Whöresof will locate his long lost sister, Slütsof Snow.

First a Poem by Hannah R Wolansky read by Kaiga.

Bethan Looms writes "Here Princess Slütsöf is lucky enough to bump into Ninja fairy Bea Chermeat on her way to the dreaded Ghost Forest. Bea Chermeat a 6 times winner of the annual Blood Lake wet t-shirt and archery games offers to accompany and protect Slütsöf. "

--Bea looks like she has some major tude and I really like Slutsöf's chain-male vale.

Holy Moly! Am I looking at an atlas? Look how Ghost Forrest's trees form a skull for extra spookiness! Great job Eric this is going on my wall! sent in this painting (wait a minute) of Whoresof...Smelling his goat sword and... waiting for his rainbow towel to dry?

London Smith writes (beautifully translate from German by google) "I have and wonderful idea for your webensieries. The Good Slütsof travels to the deepest reaches of dragonlant and discovers the dressing nest of dragons! He is valuable friend of Slütsof and they defeaten enemiesen.".

--Technically having four legs makes him a Wyvern and not a Dragon but a valuable frënd none the less.

Wayne writes "Poor Whoresof is trying to fertilise the magic kingdom but the evil witch keeps turning his turds into gold so she can buy a new broom."

--Wow Whoresöf is really going for it in this one. Damn that blasted Evil Witch! Question: can she only convert goat turds into gold? What a odd spell.

Harrison really channeled some Donlald Judd in this minimalist 64x64 picture. He writes "I have drawn Slutsof as her castle burns around her because of the evil tyrant King!"

MistsofMorning sent in this picture of Slutof seeing the rare orange dragon of dragonland for the first time, she was so surprised her crown popped off her head. 

And finally I leave you with a story penned by FaleBoat. For added adventure listen to Panosdk's Anthem of Stagrâm while you read.

Slütsöf meets the Tricky Troll Trüsellhölm

And so Slütsöf entered the spooky Ghost Forrest,
Of what horrors lay, which would be the most horrest?
and as she set foot on a bridge made of stone,
Up jumped a troll! who let out a great moan!
"Grarr! Who disturbs me, and wakes me from slumber!"
the mighty troll said, voice sounding of thunder
"Tis I!" Slütsöf said, her voice with a giggle,
Her cheeks rosy red and her tail with a wiggle.
"Slütsöf" he said, "why, I know no such name!"
"But I'm Trüsellhölm, and this bridge I do claim!"
She said "Trüsellhölm! what a name with such might!
Why my dear friend do you cause such a freight?!"
"Fear" the troll laughed "is what earns me my pay!
Without such a threat I can eat only hay!"
"A pity" laughed Slütsöf, "for I'm a princess"
I carry no money and beg your forgiveness!
My brother was lost and so find him I must,
I seek companions whom in I can trust!
Great strength and prowess I can see in you, troll
Will you help rather than charge me a toll?
with your assistance I promise you that
your meals will be great, and gushing with much fat!
The troll looked quite long and quite hard at the duck,
and said "can you promise I'm not getting screwed?"
My word is my bond!" brave Slütsöf proclaimed
"You need have no worries for all know my name!
Behind leave this bridge, and far journey with me,
Place trust in me troll, with your eyes you will see!"
Trüsellhölms stomach then growled with a roar,
He'd join this duck princess, who stood him before.
"Alright!" he proclaimed with his voice cracking loud
"but you'd better beware that we trolls are quite proud!"
I'll join you dear Slütsöf but make me no fool
I'll bear no betrayal, and that is a rule!"
"Nor I!" quacked Slütsöf, "best of friends we'll soon be"
And off walked the pair, a strange sight for to see.


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